To start being more of a happy person all of the time, not just chasing the short lived high from the new iPhone we are going to have to switch our thinking around a little bit. If you are only ever seeking pleasure and you are not happy much, very often or at all, you have to take a look inside not outside.
Over the last few years more and more research has been conducted on what happiness is and why we are, or are not, happy in life. Have you ever known the person who always says, if I just had a boyfriend I would be happy, or if I just had more money I would be happy, or if had a better job I would be happy... The problem is, when they get this they are only happy for a short while then the high goes away and they are not happy anymore. Bummer.
The same can be true of people who say money is happiness. Money is not happiness, it can only bring a short lived version of happiness and once it's gone you are no longer happy. Money can only buy so many things and once those things are acquired there is nothing more to acquire. You can only buy so many houses, or so many cars or so many trips to wherever before you can't anymore. And once this happens, if you are not truly happy within, you are not going to be very happy and will seek to find other ways to make you happy. But seeking to make a thing, an object or possession that will make you happy is not the way to happiness, it is short lived.
Before you got the new iPhone, how convinced that once you got it you would be so very happy and thats all you needed to be happy, to have the newest and latest and greatest iPhone? Probably, like most people, you said once I get the new phone I am going to be so happy. And when you got it? Yup you were so happy! But then what happened? After about a week or two all that happiness went away and you were now looking for the next thing to make you happy.
To understand better why this is we first must dive into the 3 types of happiness.
Pleasure: The pleasure type of happiness is always chasing the next high. This is the type that requires a constant flow of stimuli to achieve the happiness and once the steady flow stops, we get miserable again and are no longer happy. It is truly chasing the high. This is the person who says, if I just had the new iPhone everything would be great! This type of happiness is very short lived and shortest lasting.
Passion: The passion type of happiness is known as the flow, where time just flies by, it is where peak performance and peak engagement meet. It is like the musician who loves to play piano and sits down to play only to look at the clock and hours have gone by. This type of happiness is the second longest lasting.
Higher Purpose: The higher-purpose type of happiness is about being part of something bigger than yourself that has meaning to you. This would be something like helping to feed the homeless by starting a group that goes out on Saturdays and brings them a brown bag with lunch in it, or being a mentor to youth, as some examples. This is the longest lasting type of happiness.
The best way to achieve being happy for no reason/all the time we first must seek out the Higher Purpose type of happiness. Once we have achieved this then find the things you are passionate about to bring in the second layer of happiness into your life. Doing these two things first will bring you a joyful life full of happiness. Once these two types have been achieve than go ahead and get you some pleasure.
Find your higher-purpose, whatever that may be, and do the things you are passionate about before you seek pleasure.